The short answer: you will walk much further than you expect, sleep much less than you expect, and see fewer bands than you planned. The people who enjoy their first festival most are the ones who accept all three in advance and stop trying to optimise the weekend.
Everyone gets given the same advice before their first festival: take wellies, take a portable charger, don't lose your ticket. All true, all covered elsewhere. This is the other stuff – the things you only find out by going.
You will walk a very long way
A large UK festival site is the size of a small town. Ten to fifteen miles a day over uneven ground is normal, and much of it happens in wellies. This changes the calculation on everything: on footwear, on how much you carry around with you, and on whether it is really worth walking twenty-five minutes across site to catch three songs.
Break your boots in beforehand. Wellies with thick socks and an insole are fine; wellies with thin socks will destroy your heels by Saturday lunchtime.
The clash you're worried about will resolve itself
First-timers plan the weekend band by band, colour-code the line-up and agonise over clashes. Then they arrive, discover the walk between stages, get talking to someone at a bar, and end up watching something they'd never heard of instead.
Pick two or three genuine must-sees for the whole weekend and treat everything else as optional. The unplanned discoveries in a small tent at 2pm are, for most people, what they remember years later.
Sleep is the real currency
The campsite does not go quiet when the arena closes. It gets louder. Someone will be playing music at 4am, someone else will fall over your guy lines, and the sun will turn your tent into a greenhouse by 7am.
- Earplugs and an eye mask are the two cheapest upgrades to your weekend that exist.
- Pitch away from main paths, toilets and the perimeter fence nearest the arena.
- Accept an afternoon nap. Everyone does it. It is not a failure.
The unwritten campsite rules
- Don't walk between someone's tent and their guy lines. Go round.
- Don't pitch so close that your porch opens into someone's living space, if there's any alternative.
- Take your rubbish to the bins each morning – gulls and rain will deal with it otherwise.
- If you hear someone genuinely in distress at night, check on them. Festival campsites look after each other and that is not a cliche.
- Take your tent home.
Nobody is looking at you
People agonise about festival outfits and then arrive to find a field of thirty thousand people in whatever kept them warm. Wear what you like, including glitter and something ridiculous, because it genuinely does not matter and nobody is judging. What does matter is being warm enough at 1am.
Arrive earlier than you think
The gate queue on the first morning can be two hours. Arriving mid-morning rather than mid-afternoon gets you a better pitch, a shorter queue and time to set up in daylight. Pitching a tent in the dark and the rain, having queued for three hours, is how a weekend gets off to a bad start.
Take a photo of your tent and your pitch
Not just the tent – the view from your tent, and the nearest landmark or flag. Every row looks identical at 2am and your phone may well be dead. Some people note the postcode-style grid reference many festivals now paint on campsite posts. Do that too.
Food matters more than you think
Alcohol, dancing, walking fifteen miles and four hours of sleep is a combination that catches up with people who aren't eating properly. The person who has a proper breakfast every morning has a noticeably better weekend than the person who lives on chips. Salt, water and something with protein in it, every day.
Go to the small stages
The main stage is the reason most people buy a ticket, and it is often the least interesting part of the festival. Cabaret tents, spoken word, comedy, folk stages, the tiny dance tent in the woods – this is where festivals differentiate themselves from a concert. Spend at least one afternoon deliberately wandering with no plan.
Know where the welfare tent is
Every UK festival has a welfare or wellbeing tent as well as medical facilities. They deal with lost friends, lost phones, people who have taken too much of something, people who are overwhelmed, and people who just need somewhere quiet for half an hour. They are non-judgemental and free. Find out where it is on day one so you don't have to look for it in an emergency.
Have a meeting point and a meeting time
Phones die, signal fails and the crowd swallows people. Agree a physical landmark – a specific flag, a bar, the entrance to a particular tent – and a time to be there if anyone gets separated. This is the single most useful thing you can organise in advance.
The last day is harder than the first
Packing up a wet tent while tired and hungover, then walking to a distant car park, is the low point of most festivals. Plan for it: keep clean clothes and something to eat sealed in the car, agree a departure time the night before, and don't book anything for that evening.
Frequently asked questions
Is it okay to go to a festival alone?
Yes, and a lot of people do. Campsites are sociable, and solo festival-goers tend to meet more people than groups do. Tell someone at home your plans and keep your valuables on you.
How do I shower at a festival?
Most large festivals have showers, sometimes free and sometimes paid. Queues are shortest early morning and during the main stage headliner. Many people skip them entirely and rely on wet wipes and dry shampoo.
What if I hate it?
Give it until the second evening. Almost everyone has a wobble on the first night, usually caused by tiredness, a bad pitch or the sheer scale of the place. It nearly always passes.
Do I need to book a camping ticket separately?
At some festivals camping is included, at others it is an add-on, and at day-ticket-only events there is no camping at all. Check before you buy.
